According to Hofmann: The head DJ syndrome
If you无毛视频檙e a well-versed student of psychology or even a casual observer of the practice, you无毛视频檙e aware that the brain is one messed-up organ, clinically speaking.
It无毛视频檚 like a super computer in a sci-if movie that everyone marvels at until a stupid glitch causes the computer to launch all the nukes to wipe out humanity.
Nothing about the brain illustrates that dire scenario more than the DJ in your head.
If you don无毛视频檛 know what I无毛视频檓 talking about, anyone who has ever said they have a song stuck in their head has a head DJ.
I无毛视频檝e named my head DJ 无毛视频淒J Head无毛视频� because I无毛视频檓 not good with naming things, and I figured that name sounded like one a DJ would give to themselves.
While I无毛视频檓 pretty sure most head DJs are similar, I无毛视频檒l tell you a little about DJ Head.
Right off the bat, he无毛视频檚 a jerk.
无毛视频淗eeeeeeey, coming up is that slightly catchy song that annoys the snot out of you that I无毛视频檒l play about 24,000 times! And don无毛视频檛 worry, I won无毛视频檛 play the whole song, just a certain section over and over and over again like a TikTok video!无毛视频�
That无毛视频檚 right. Not only is he a jerk, he无毛视频檚 a jerk who knows how to edit and play song snippets, and he无毛视频檚 a workaholic.
无毛视频淗eeeeeeeey, DJ Head coming to you live from Skull Studios. It无毛视频檚 13 minutes past the midnight hour, but it无毛视频檚 really time to replay parts of that stupid song your wife and kid played in the car earlier!无毛视频�
I only wished DJ Head talked up the song before playing it like a real DJ. That way, I can at least get a beak from the insane loop of 无毛视频淪hake it Off无毛视频� by Taylor Swift.
However, every now and then, DJ Head will put a song on a loop that I actually like, so he无毛视频檚 not all that bad, but it never lasts as he pulls the rug out from under me every time.
Also, he takes requests, but it无毛视频檚 the equivalent of me threatening a real DJ by holding their favorite pet over a boiling pot of vegetable stew so I can hear the full version of Warren Zevon无毛视频檚 无毛视频淚无毛视频檒l Sleep When I无毛视频檓 Dead无毛视频� over and over again. But, sooner or later, you get weak or lose your will and it无毛视频檚 back to annoying songs and Fluffy Chowder.
I don无毛视频檛 know what DJ Head likes more, annoying pop songs or commercial jingles. What I do know is I can sing the phone numbers of four plumbers and two heating and cooling companies without hesitation.
I can无毛视频檛 watch television commercials anymore without the dreaded idea that I无毛视频檓 going to be too slow on the 无毛视频渕ute无毛视频� button and be stuck with a jingle for magical wart-removing medication in my head all day.
Now, I know you read this column because I have all the answers (even though there have never been any questions), and the million-dollar question this week is 无毛视频淗ow do I destroy my head DJ?无毛视频�
Well, before one can figure that out, one has to know how their head DJ came about, why do they do what they do, why do they do it over and over again and why is it mostly the annoying things that are repeated.
I don无毛视频檛 know about your head DJ, but mine was a product of my parents and my teachers.
While I无毛视频檓 not sure how 无毛视频渓earning stuff无毛视频� has changed since I was a kid, my parents and teachers always had me learn things that were boring and things I hated to study by first writing it over and over and over again until your writing hand is petrified into a claw.
On top of that, when my mother went over homework with me, she无毛视频檇 sing a song and try to put the lesson into that song.
Nothing like learning about tectonic plate movement in the style of a George Throrogood song.
无毛视频淢ovin无毛视频� on over无毛视频lidin无毛视频� on over无毛视频he plates are movin无毛视频� 无毛视频檆ause the hot molten rock radiation is moving in!无毛视频�
Suddenly the head DJ makes a lot more sense, right?
Your head DJ is a part of your glorious, yet messed-up mind, clinically speaking.
Sure, it无毛视频檚 annoying, but we have family, friends, coworkers and neighbors who are also annoying, and we deal with them because they无毛视频檙e a part of our lives, just like our head DJ.
So the best advice I can give is simply do with your head DJ what you do with those people in your life and ignore them at all costs, don无毛视频檛 interact with them, smack your head against something and maybe they无毛视频檒l go away.
Unless, of course, there无毛视频檚 a need to contact a plumber or explain earthquakes, then DJ Head is back on duty.
According to Hofmann is written by staff reporter Mark Hofmann of Rostraver Township. His books, 无毛视频淕ood Mourning! A Guide to Biting the Big One 无毛视频� and Dying, Too无毛视频� and 无毛视频淪tupid Brain,无毛视频� are available on Amazon.com.